Saturday, April 19, 2008

Power of Presence.

Regan never spoke. She really didn't make much noise at all. She sat...silent.

Our house if full of noise. People coming in. People dropping things off...lots of tears dropping.
Children playing tag. Dishwasher running. Washer and Dryer. Lots of showers this morning. Ryder playing his video game. Rylee dancing and playing with her cell phone (old phone of ours).

Yet it is so quiet. I feel lonely. My hear and hands need something to do. How is that someone who made such little noise leave such a deep silence. I think she keeps teaching me the power of presence. It was a greatest lesson to me. The power that "being" gives the world. I always want to say something. I want to Do something. Regan taught me that is okay to just BE.

I miss her.

13 comments:

Leanne said...

My prayers to you. I love you all.

Dan and Tammy said...

praying for you.

Unknown said...

i prayed for your mother's heart this morning Chantel, as we sang these words in church..."...lead me on and I will run after you..."

continually thinking of you,

HODAPP said...

I think the silence is the hardest part - my heart weeps for you all. My love and my prayers are constant....

Cindy Keller said...

Ron Otto's words moved the whole congregation this morning...the example of your family and Regan's life...and death have set before us...it challenges me to make heart changes about important choices in life. Choices that ultimately can impact others. Thank you for your choice to be that example and to love Regan and in effect US ALL so much to rise to the occasion of such a ministry. You truly are in ministry whether you know it or feel it or not because this experience has touched me personally in such a way that I'll never forget. Thank God for His Spirit that covers you and gives you peace and comfort...I pray that you continue to rest under that blanket of peace. I love you...

shannon said...

I miss her with you, sweet friend. I am praying for your heart as only another mommy can. I love you.

AnnG said...

I got your blog site from VVCC in Dallas (Cindy Hardy sent it out) and I just wanted to say I'll be praying for you while you go through this time of grief, healing and "aloneness". I don't know if you remember me, but I remember you guys and you were always a blessing to me while at VVCC together. May
God give you peace.

Ann Gregory

Stacey said...

My dear friend,
You have been in my heart this weekend along with your family. Grief seems to be the most difficult trial because only time will get you through it. I wish we could have been there to give you a real hug.
You are in our thoughts, please pass along hugs to Brian, Ryder and Riley.
XOXOXO
Stacey

Mrs. Anweiler said...

Chantell, Regan definately taught us how to "be." When I got to be with Regan, Sunday nights were always my favorite. Brian, Rylee, Ryder and you would all head to church, and Regan and I would stay back and just be. After she was ready for bed, we would sit together in the chair and just be together. I always looked forward to this peaceful time in my week.
Justin and I are thinking of you and praying for you lots!

KennyGolden said...

We love you all, and are praying for you.

Kathy Streber said...

Our thoughts and prayers are with you today and always. We love you guys. You have been so strong for Reagan and we are so proud of all of you.. She could not have asked for a more caring family.

Love You,

Kathy, Gage & Taylor Streber

marci said...

we love you guys and have been praying constantly for you all.
Brandon has been thanking God at dinner the last few nights that Regan is in heaven and gets to play :).

our kids are all anxious to see you all and make sure you are alright. they have each hung Regan's picture in their rooms and love the stone.

praying God's peace that surpasses understanding and strenght and endurance as you visit and travel.

God speed,
marci

Karen said...

We are praying for you here in Oklahoma....we went by to see little Regan while at Clinton, but she had not arrived yet.(We were at Marie Graham's service in Butler.) Please know God stays close to those with broken hearts. He must think you have strong shoulders to bear such a beautiful and huge burden!! love & prayers, Karen (Tammy G's mom)