Sunday, March 04, 2007

...thoughts from the mama

It is my turn to blog. Brian graciously handled everything while I was with Regan in the hospital. I was so glad to come home. As you remember two weeks ago I asked you to please pray a little more focused for the relief of the seizures. She had a couple days of relief. I believe that those days of respite were to hold us off from taking her in until this past week so our new neurologist would be on call. Last Tuesday was very surreal for me. I could tell by the way the doctor and nurses were treating me that Regan was in bad shape. It felt much like the first trip to the ER we ever made in March of 2002...only this time the world of blood draws, monitors, EEG's, and all thing neurology and pulmanology are in my realm of understanding. It is amazing what comfort familiarity can be. When all the nurses left and the doctors were seeing other patients Regan and I sat by ourselves. My cell phone didn't work so no one to call. I sat in a fairly dark rook watched her body strain to take a each breath. I stroked her hair and stared at her sweet face between the bed rails and rested my head there. I decided to pull my bible from my purse and I read....

"I love the LORD because he has heard my appeal for mercy. Because He as turned His ear to me, I will call you to him as long as I live. The ropes of death were wrapped around me and torments of Sheol overcame me; I encountered trouble and sorrow. Then I called on the name of the LORD; "Lord save me!" The LORD is gracious and righteous and God is compassionate. The LORD guards the inexperienced; I was helpless and He saved me. Return to your rest my soul, for the LORD has been good to you, for You LORD rescued me from death my eyes from tears my feet from stumbling, I will walk before the LORD in the land of the living." Ps116:1-9

I cried....I had not idea what the next few days would hold...It was good to remember truth. The truth that no matter what happened the Lord is compassionate, he guards the inexperienced, and he returns rest. He has done all of this for Regan (the innocent and helpless) before and no doubt he will do it again. He has done that for me (the not so innocent and helpless) before no doubt he will do it again.

Regan is doing great. She is resting well, breathing well and seems to be handling the new meds well. Brian's flight went well...even in Vegas he gets us at 4:30a. He called me at 6:00am Vegas time and was driving around drinking coffee...that is the man I love! Ryder and Rylee enjoyed a pajama day yesterday. I scrapbooked most of the day 14 pages! I think think this is called the land of the living....

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