I'm Lovin' It!

So I wanted to make a post about a few things that I am really loving right now.

First, I am enamored with my new cookbook Deceptively Delicious. I have a little known obsession about my kid's lunch. My kids are great eaters but I find it hard to get all the fruit's and veggies in each day when packing healthy school lunch is difficult. So, I ordered this great cookbook. The idea is that you make veggie and fruit puree's that you add in your food. For example this week I made "Apple Muffins" which had apple non sweet apple sauce and carrot puree which adds fiber and beta caroteen to their food and you don't even taste it. I also made Mac and Cheese that has cheese but also butternut squash which is good for your heart and skin and cauliflower puree help your immune system and help your body fight certain types of cancer. I have made other things too but I will stop here. This is a great gift idea for mom's like me who are looking to feed their families nutritious food!It is clever, snicky and easy to do!

I'm also loving my coffee every morning. We combine Starbucks Espresso Roast with House Blend. So yummy...it adds a great caramel flavor. Good job honey! BUT I am a huge fan of Starbucks Christmas blend. I look forward to it all year. Even they guy the runs our Starbucks on campus knows and shows me when the shipment arrives. It actually brought tears to my eyes on Sunday because I got to have my first cup on on my way to church. There is something about the blend that just suits me.
Okay, so the computer underlined that phrase all on its own...must be the Holy Spirit adding emphasis. But I do love it!

I also simply love the pictures and art work in the book. It is a spiral rung book so it lays open nicely lies flat! In general I love it!
My husband also replaced my camera that was run over. It is the same camera I had before but the newer model..I love the Cannon Power Shot Camera! I love this new feature that is called "accent" . We are having tons of fun with it as a family. It pulls one accent color from the background and highlights it in the picture. Fun stuff! I love it!

Victory's Cry

For two weeks now we have been giving breathing treatments every two hours. We have sucked more mucus that I care to describe. We have worked tirelessly to arrive at the point today where she is currently only breathing room air and is is breathing easily. She is producing some good coughs every few hours and we gave her no breathing treatments throughout the night last night. If you have never given any breathing treatments the picture to the left will mean nothing to you but if you have this is a three days worth of breathing treatment trash. Each one of these is one breathing treatment. Like empty casings scattered on a battle field. This is what remains of the battle fought in the bedroom of our little warrior Regan. Thankfully this battle we seem to have won.

This morning our family said a prayer of praise to God. We promised each other a long time ago that we would praise Him no matter what but this morning our hearts of full of joy because he has strengthened Regan yet again to defeat what seemed to be the impossible. As a matter of fact we praised Him because He strengthened us which at times felt impossible too! We have all witnessed yet another sermon on how with God all things are possible.

Someday Regan will lose a battle. I think about what that blog entry will say sometimes. About how that might be a tough battle for me to stick to my vow and praise Him in that moment too. But this morning I remember that I can be full of joy because the true reality that Jesus has already won the war. So I ask you today to praise Him with us. Would you do as Jesus asked and rejoice with those who are rejoicing. We can't all feast together which is what I want to do...throw a big party and celebrate. But will you do something today to celebrate...maybe drink a latte'...eat some pie...have a coke....I don't know what it is for you but say a prayer of thanksgiving and celebrate that the this battle and the ulitmate war is won! ps I took this picture this morning ...it blesses me to see her face free from O2..how about you?

Things that comfort me

This morning Regan and I are home by ourselves. Brian is teaching Sunday School at West Side Christian Church in Springfield, IL Ryder and Rylee went to church. Regan is still struggling with her breathing so she, I and Moby staying home. So we have been discussing some great truths that connect us to the body. We decided that these things bring us great comfort.

That one day all people will confess Jesus. What a day that will be! All people every nation, who claim many different languages, through out all time in history will confess Jesus. Even people who on earth did not have the ability to talk! We long for that gathering. Come Lord Jesus come!

All the struggle will be over. Creation will have the rest of it's redemption and will rest. This week I am tired so I long for a day when fatigue will be no more. I think Regan will be glad not to have to work so hard for a single breathe. She is doing better than she was. Praise God for that. We continue to do breathing treatments around the clock though we are adding in some breaks here and there. Mostly we are practicing our trust in God do sustain her by His power. I will say that I am continually amazed by her. She is so strong. I am a total wimp. She and Ryder had some snuggle time yesterday. It was good for both of them.

Okay back to the topic of the day...Jesus is close to those who are afflicted. So though this struggle is difficult he is near to us. What would we do without that. What a treasure to have HIM near us. We understand Jesus more when we struggle. Since He struggled with Joy. We understand how difficult that must be. I also believed God's heart is tender and so He heart of comfort is revealed in struggle.

Although my heart wonders from God's truth and God never wonder's from us. Although friends and family call to check in on how things are going. God knows. He doesn't have to read the blog to get an update. This makes my heart sing. I've been thinking about that a lot this week. I've been home a lot and when I set down to pray. I take a breathe and begin to share my heart with God's and I feel the Spirit say to me..."Child where do you think I have been?" So I express my heart because the experiences in days like these do a number on my heart....so I get set straight when I let his Spirit set me right.n Thank you for your presence Lord.

Although the Mills are stuck at home we always make time for fun. So I planned a FUNdo night last night and I though you might enjoy some pics of that. Fondue us great for Rylee because she is getting used to her new expander in her mouth! Round one was grilled chicken, broccoli, green apples, bread and mushrooms with cheesy fondue. Round two was chocolate fondue...no marshmellows this time because they are too sticky but they loved the cream puffs and bananas!

Our little Yoda

Our family host's a Halloween party every year. I know many of you do not celebrate because of the evil but we have made the choice to know that This is the day the Lord has made and We rejoice and are glad in it. We love to dress up so we go for it!. So last night in the midst of breathing treatements and suction we had 25 people over. Here are all the kids dressed up and ready to hit the neighborhood. We love our neighbors so we look forward to it every year. We also eat together and each family brings information about a saint. A saint is someone who believes in Jesus. Each family either tell us about their saint or acts out a skit about it. It is great to learn about our brothers and sisters in Christ through out history who have took a bold stand for Christ. Here is a picture of the mom's that worked hard to get costumes together and make yummy food. Tesha, Jennifer, Me, Cindy and Shannon are all important people in my life. They all are those friends who I call on for lots of things in my life. I look forward to this night all year because of the sweet fellowship we all share.
Tesha and Jennifer live in the country and have to neighbors to Trick or Treat at and Cindy lives in my neighborhood and Shannon well she is just always invited.

Our kids decided to be Star Wars people this year. Ryder is Luke, Rylee Leia and Regan Yoda. They looked great. Thanks Nana for helping us make our costumes again this year! You rock! Regan continues to struggle to breathe. We are doing breathing treatments every two hours. She had big attack last night after everyone had gone home. She is better today. Please continue to pray for her breathing. We are trusting God that each day is in His plan. He knows what it will hold. We trust that what He has called us to He will equip us for. He just have to walk in the courage and boldness to DO it for Him.. On an added side note. My sweet husband let me sleep in until 7:20 this morning. He made the kids lunches and handled all the morning stuff so I could sleep from 2:30 to 6:30 with out interruption. Now that is love! Not the flowers and chocolate kind but really unconditional selfless love. I am so blessed my him everyday but today was special.

Quick Update

Well Regan is still not better...her is a recap of the last few days. So we went on an antibiotic for UTI...she also has E-coli in her gut...not the kind that kills you but it is a serious infection. This infection has also caused pulmonary issues. So she is working really hard to take every breathe. This is very difficult to watch...down right scary at times. We aren't for sure if it is officially pneumonia because our primary care physician has not called us back from the X ray we took YESTERDAY at noon! BUT either way the antibiotic she is one will handle all three of these issues. As of noon today she has been fever free for 24 hours for the first time in five days. We are hoping she will start to improve. We are giving her breathing treatments every two hours around the clock so pray for our strength because we are not getting a lot of sleep at one time. Mostly pray for her. I will update more on Wednesday.

Down, Down, Down...

Well, yesterday I took Regan for some tests to be run. Today my Mom and I took her in to the doctor to get the test results...she has a urinary tract infection. So she is on an antibiotic to cure that and the fever has been up and DOWN but mostly down. I thank you all for praying. I am sure that as the prayers went up the healing flowed DOWN.

The rain came DOWN all day today. I must have had a brain fart because I straitened my hair today...which means it didn't stay strait. ARRRRR.

My Mom and Dad headed back DOWN to Oklahoma today. We are so glad they were here. Above is a picture of Regan and my Mom. Aren't they pretty. I know my Mom looks so good! I claim those genes in Jesus name. Below is a picture of the head board and pillows we made. The details are hard to see in this picture but you can get the general idea. They are such a blessing to me. Mr Albert in Mary Poppins in right when he says "leaving is the saddest thing I ever heard."
Ryder had his first school dance tonight so he had fun getting DOWN with all his friends. He said it was typical most of the boys were "too cool" to dance but he wasn't. He fast danced and slow danced with all his friends. No body tried to kiss him so that was a great relief to me.

While Ryder and Brian were gone tonight the girls and I snuggled down on the couch and watched my favorite movie Mary Poppins. Rylee and I each took turns holding Regan while we held each others hand. Sweet times....Rylee and I decided when we breathe in Regan it just calms us DOWN!

Pretty in Pink (and brown)

This picture was taken last week...Rylee and Kim Terashita so I thought I would post it....Regan looks so sweet in her brown and pink!

My folks are here this week. We having been making Halloween costumes....Luke for Ryder, Leia for Rylee, and Yoda for Regan. I am sure you will see pictures of this next week. We also made pillows and a headboard for my bed. Papa made stew to put in the freezer for the kids to have this winter for lunch. So we have been busy. It is great to have them here. Their presence is a blessing.
Yesterday my mom and I took Regan to the doctor in Springfield so here is the update. She has lost a pound. This is frustrating because I thought she was gaining. We are increasing her calories again so hopefully that will help.
She still has a pretty large kidney stone in one kidney but otherwise better than three months ago. We are just watching to see what she does in regards to this.
The biggest news and prayer point for today is that last night she started fevering. This is never good because kids with Regan's disorder don't need to be stressed out by a fever. So, right now I am waiting to hear back from the doctor to see what she wants to do. Could you please pray? I know you do....but today I want to ask for God to show us what is wrong with Regan to cause a fever and that He would make it better. We are hoping for a urine test and finger stick to check her blood counts to see if there is an infection in her body. Ultimately the LORD knows her full well...He makes her well. So would you pray a prayer in faith for Him to do just that. I'll update more when I have more.

"And the prayer offered in faith will make a sick person well; the Lord will raise him up." James 5:15

An Autum Ramble

The last few days I have really enjoyed listening to the wind blow in the trees. The sound of my dog barking at the squirrels that are working so hard to prepare for the winter freeze. I hear them while I am in the kitchen as they run on my neighbors garage roof. I hear the acorns drop to the ground. My days are quiet. The sounds of Fall make a harmony to the steady sounds of Regan's breathing and the rotation of her feeding pump. This is the sound track of my day. I love people and all the life they bring but I find with age I also love silence. The peace of knowing I am hearing only what God wants me to hear. That somehow HE is teaching me something IN what I hear. It is almost as if the trees say "shhhhh listen." Often my early mornings are crazy because of getting the kids off to school and my afternoon's and evening even louder and busier because with the return of the children comes noise. I love their noises but sometimes I need peace. Fall has been one of the joys of living in Illinois. Dallas didn't have the same beauty as Fall in the north has.

As I listen to the wind it reminds me that change is coming. I am a fan of Summer because of the the joy of that season but I feel most at home in Fall.

I love pumpkin in all forms. I love to look at them, eat there meat, hold them in my hands, eat their seeds...what a hardly veggie a pumpkin is. So amazing. My parents always visit in October so it is one of my happiest weeks because I love to be with them. I love who they are. I want to be who they raised me to be. I love the anticipation of Holiday's and Fall if full of that. I love to wear vests...I have a navy one that was probably made in the 1970's. It is the kind you picture on a farmer; slick and puffy. Not as glamorous as the modern day puffy vest. I bought it last year at the Mission Mart here in town. I have a story in my mind that my Grandpa LR would have worn a vest like this. I picture him in my mind when I put it on. I see him driving in his teal farming truck toodling down the dusty road that ran in front of my Grandparents farm house. And in my mind he is wearing this vest. It has a tear on the pocket and I think it happened while working He was working on a fence. (remember this story is completely made up but I do these things to keep myself entertained) When I wear it I think of him. I miss him since he lives with Jesus now. I also love soup. Sometime we can eat it three times a week in the Fall. So warm, so filling, so practical because it is all in one bowl. I love the pace of Fall...I feel my heart want to slow down..anticipating winter's hibernation. Yet there is the work of harvest time too....just plain ole practical work that must be done...the play of summer is really over...Fall is here..time to get ready. My heart is full of praise to the ONE who spoke this into being....He made it up...I wonder if it was a story in His divine Mind before he spoke into being. All of this that we know wasn't and then He made it to be.

"I will thank the Lord with all my heart; I will declare all Your wonderful works. I will rejoice and boast about You; I will sing about Your name Most High." Ps 9:1-2

Friendship with Jesus

Do you ever have seasons in your life where you feel a distance from God but you can't figure out why.....I think I am in one of those. I have been meditating on what it is to be a friend of God. I must admit I have always wanted to be "a friend." I've always wanted to be on the inside track...I like to be liked by most people. I love my friends a lot and I love to BE a good friend. So I've been focusing my thoughts lately about how I want to be a friend of God's....not just a Christ follower but a friend like in John 15:14 where Jesus says "You are my friend if you do what I command."

It sorta sounds like second grade girls on the playground doesn't it? "I won't be your friend if you don't jump rope with me." A little like Nellie Olsen from Little House (which is a bit of an addiction; Ma is one of my hero/mentor's...sad but true...sad but true). So scripture tells us that not all followers of Jesus are his friends. So my human nature comes in line with the Christ in me and I want to be counted among the friends. I heard it said recently (maybe Beth Moore or maybe JK Jones or maybe both in different ways ) sat that "When you adopt the interest of God you are a friend of God." Of course obedience isn't enough because a slave can do what is said but we are not slaves but chosen for relationship. This is deeper than what Nellie was striving for...she just wanted to control....Jesus isn't dysfunctional in anyway. He seems to want us to remain IN Him...remain in His Love...produce fruit from His love. (John 15)

I liken this to a marriage relationship...this deep friendship where I take on the interest of Brian because I love him...so I love what He loves....his job...his friends...his shows...his family....his stresses...his worries....his passions.....his wounds....his joys.....I adopt his interests because I love him. That is how I remain in him...remain in love with him...all of this is a product of our love...a sweet friendship.

This effort and friendship bridges the gap of distance, busyness, fatigue, stress, sin.....just like an excellent friend married or not you haven't talked to in a while...you pick right up. Because you have a history that is deep. I am thankful for friends like these....I'm thankful that Jesus is willing to call me friend....I am so glad that He took on my interest at the cross. What a wonderful Saviour we have in Him. "No one has greater love than this, that someone would lay down his life for his friends." (John 15:11) This is friendship.....I'm so glad he walks His talk...makes he way less Nellie like doesn't it. Be blessed today!

Just a few quick updates.......ryder is in romeo and Juliet this weekend...exciting. Our dear friends the Terashita's are coming to watch...exciting... My parents come next week...exciting...we are entering the holiday season....which is very exciting....
Regan is doing better...please pray for her seizures which are very strong and long right now....oh and this is NOT exciting.

So Blessed!

Well, Rylee did turn 9 with Style!
We love this picture of her!. She and I wore our Twinkie shirt dresses! We love to plan and have parties. She wants to thank everyone for their sweet comments...oh so fun...so so good to be built up in the Lord!

I wanted to send an update on Regan....she is more alert than she has been. She is on an antibiotic so it seems to be helping. Thanks for your prayers about here. I know that the Holy Spirit is always informing us and prompting us to pray in certain ways.

Before I posted the email about Regan last week I got three different calls or emails wondering how she was and feeling the burden to pray....Praise God that the Holy Spirit doesn't need a blog update to bring His people to pray. As I write tears come to my eyes as I reflect on how God uses His body to minister to each other in so many ways. I am so glad that He has taken us into Himself, Blessed us in Christ, and then brakes us to be given to the world as a blessing....I thank God each time of think of this truth and each time I think of you.

Our Rylee is 9!

Monday is Rylee's Birthday.

First, Rylee is a comforter. I believe with all my heart that the Lord has uniquely gifted Rylee to bring is comfort to others. She just makes you feel better. Right now Ryder can't sleep unless he sleeps in Rylee's room. He says the he just feels closer to everybody when he is in her room. She is the one who will sit with you when you get hurt on the playground. She is the one that will listen while you retell your story. Doesn't everyone need compassion? In her listening and being with she is comforting.
"He comes alongside us when we go through hard times, and before you know it, he brings us alongside someone else who is going through hard times so that we can be there for that person just as God was there for us." 1 Cor. 1:4

Rylee is fun! We call her the FUN FUN girl! She love to laugh and play. She is like her daddy in that way. Her laugh is infectious..her humor is on spot...what a joy to have her in our life. When she reads to me in the afternoon she make the story so interesting because she is in no hurry to get done so she makes it fun to listen to. Recently when Brian was at a college retreat for ISU he was telling about how she is so girly but also loves buger and fart jokes like a junior high boy. So, when Rylee went out to the retreat the next day this college boy kept farting in front of her to get her to laugh...she didn't according to her "because I don't even know him...I try to save that for people I know. We are so glad she is the life of our party.
"Laugh with your happy friends when they are happy; share tears when they are down" Romans " Romans 12:15


Rylee is make to mother....or maybe sometimes even smother. Rylee is a lover. I have said since she was two that someday she will have a 15 passenger van full of children. We knew she needed to be big sister to get practice for all the people she would need take care of. She loves to hug and hold and carry anyone who will let her...and even sometimes when they don't. I don't really know what God is going to do with her but I know that she sees the heart of God for those who can not or will not speak for themselves. That is really what a mother does...advocate...advocate for Jesus, for their child, for what is right......
"Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of the poor and needy." Proverbs 31:8

Rylee is just a good friend. She always has a friend over or whats to be with someone. She has good friends because she is a good friend. At her birthday party this year she has girls coming that range in age from 7-11. That is Rylee....and her friend...not bound to age but all girls who are lovers of God....which makes Rylee love them back. Right now I can't be Rylee's friend because I have to be her mother...but I look forward to a time when she is much older when we can be friends....I look forward to her companionship in that way...I will always be her mother but someday we can add friend to that list!
"A friend loves at all times; and a brother is born for adversity" Proverbs 17:17

Regan Update

Hello everyone.....this is just a quick update and a request for prayer. I have no idea why this is underlining but maybe the computer knows this needs emphasis. I don't list prayer concerns a lot but it is heavy on my heart today to have you pray.

Regan is very tired....We miss her a lot. So would you please pray for her to have more awake time. She is more awake than she was but still too much.....

Also she is having a lot of mucus.... and coughing...I guess like allergy type issues. Would you pray for her strength and our alertness.

Thanks for all your prayer....I'll write more this weekend when I have more time. Right now she is watching Price is Right...she smiles at all the sounds. It makes me happy because my Granny used to love Price is Right.....she must have passed that gene on.



This is Lil Regan's afternoon friend...otherwise known as Ryder's nanny....This picture was taken in May. Those are the eyes we want back. Hey looks the underlining went away!

Patience

Our family has a tradition of reading a Proverb every weekday morning. We have done this since Ryder was in Kindergarten in various forms and to various levels of success. This year we all meet at the table at 7am to read it together and so Dad can pray with us before we get going our separate ways for the day. I love Proverbs for many reasons but one of them is that they are so simple because they are written for youth. He says in Proverbs 1:1-4 "The proverbs of Solomon, son of David, king of Israel; for attaining wisdom and discipline; for understanding worlds of insight; for acquiring a discipline and a prudent life, for what is right and just and fair, for giving prudence to the simple, knowledge and discretion to the young-" So for that I think all children should have the Proverbs read to them. It was one book of the Bible written directly for them. It also gives them a place to understand Biblical worldview because the Proverbs give metaphors, riddles, and parables to teach God's truth. This teaches them to look for God's wisdom in all things. There are things that are true about the world because God says so....like lying is bad, helping the poor puts us on God's side, laziness in not godly, we are responsible for our actions, arguing is uncalled for...it just gives us practical ways to live like God wants us to. I love them because they are easily applied to our everyday life. (I secretly want to write a family devotional guide from them someday....shhhhh don't tell!)
Our Proverb for today was... Proverbs 19:11 A man's wisdom gives him patience, it is to his glory to overlook an offense. It really has spoken to me today because it reminded me we have patience when we are wise. A small child has no patience because they have no wisdom. They don't understand that they have to wait for anything because everything should happen now. Yet we see with God he is so patient. He has a long long term vision. He looks past actions to the heart of the situation. He is understand that we learn a lot along the way. He is after all the holder of wisdom and understanding. It reminds me of the Israelites and how God saved them from the hand Pharaoh. Remember all God did to free them. He called Moses, 10 plagues, splitting the Red Sea and they crossed on dry ground...then he leads them by fire and by a cloud. and yet they were rebellious and impatient. Dt 1:32-33 "In spite of all of this you did not trust in the Lord your God who went ahead of you on your journey in fire by night and in cloud by day to search out places for you to camp and show you the way you should go."
They had short term vision
All they could see is the present situation
They didn't not see the point of the current struggle they were in.
They thought they knew everything.
I can't keep from thinking....A man's wisdom gives him patience."

It also reminds me of ME! I am not always patient. I lose wisdom when I lose my patience.
I forget all HE has done.
I take the trust that belongs to him and place it on other people
I take to much stock in what I can do on my own.
I think that I know too much.....thank God he is patient with me!

I am probably more patient than I used to be but less than I should be. So I guess need to wise up and admit I too am a child and need to apply another Proverb (1:5) "let the wise listen and add to their learning." Just like it is wide for a child to listen to their father/mother because they know something more than you know. They see more than you see as a child....make me like this Lord...make me like this!

Exceptional Child

For several years now we have been asked to bring Regan as a guest speaker to the "Exceptional Child" class at LCC. This is a class for students who God is preparing and calling to be professional teachers, counselors or children's ministers (even though all these careers are ministry!) So this past week we visited theses classes to share Regan's journey as an exceptional child with them. This photo was taken of the Tuesday night class. Just looking at them makes me smile! They are all exceptional women (a couple of them are even in my Spiritual Formation Group!) God will and is doing great things through their gifts!

I don't know where this quote comes from but it is one of my favorites "Preach the gospel always...when necessary use words." For a person with a lot of words you can imagine that this is instructional for me. Regan's story is one of the greatest sermon's every preached yet she has never used words. Every time I get a chance to interpret her story for her I am reminded of all the ways God can use her story to help others, encourage others and strengthen others for their own journey. Regan journey has truly been exceptional. I looked up the word ex·cep·tion·al to see what it can mean.

1: forming an exceptional :rare exceptional number of rainy days>
2: better than average : superior <exceptional skill>
3: deviating from the norm: as a: having above or below average intelligence
4: physically disabled

Yet part of her story is the view from Ryder and Rylee's exceptional shoes. Their journey is different or exceptional (definition 1 & 4) because their sister is exceptional (definition 4). We are all trying to testify to the exceptional (definition 2) power of our mighty God in our lives!

As I ramble on about my own I know you feel the same about yours. Because the truth is what makes our stories as believers exceptional is that GOD is at work here.
HE IS EXCEPTIONAL.
We are blessed by all the ways he creates normal days, average people, normal situations, everyday lives, average towns, average marriages, normal families, ...don't we all just feel average. Yet when HE steps in HE makes the story EXCEPTIONAL! He gives us a story to tell that is far from the norm.

Some Late Night Ramblings

Okay so I can't sleep......I always remember when I can't sleep that Ps 127 says that "He grants sleep to those he loves"....so I guess I am off the list for tonight....actually that is crazy because some of the most god fearing people I know don't sleep (Kim, Shannon, Vera, Julie)....I'm not awake enough to figure out what the word sleep might mean........so instead I want to write about something that has been on my mind today...There are some sounds I really love....

• I love the sound of college kids worshiping.
• I love the sound of Rylee's laugh....it makes me want to laugh. Sh laughs at lots of things.
  
• I love the sound of the dishwasher running. I always start it at night right before I hop in bed so I think I associate it with my bed which is one of my favorite earthly possessions.
• I love the sound of the coffee maker beeping....this beep is one of many beeps in my life but one of the only ones that makes me happy. The other ones that make me grumpy are my alarm, Regan's feeding pump, her oximeter, the smoke detector.....these are beeps that mean unhappy things...but coffee being done now that is good!
• I love my friend Shannon's voice mail...it is her kids singing "This is Shannon's phone..."
• I love the sound of my mom's laugh and my dad when he answers his phone because he says "Yea.." It is so my dad...like I am there in the room..not like I've called on the phone. I like it because I wish I was right there in the room.
  
• I love Regan noises. She makes the sweetest sucking noises and her songs are the best.
  
• I love the rustling sound of people turning in their Bibles.
• I love the sound of conversation around a dinner table.
• I love the roar of kids after school.
  
• I love the sound that a great knife makes when they cuts food (thanks Gary).
• I love the sound of Brian's voice when he is falling asleep and he says "I love you baby."
• I love it when Ryder says "I love you mom."
  
• I love the scream of girlfriend or sister you haven't seen a while...that raw reaction that my favorite women have when they see someone they haven't seen in a while.
• I love the sound of someone saying, "Chantell, what do you think?"
• I love the chatter of women all gathered together in a room.
  
• I love the sound of my fingers tapping on this keyboard...knowing it communicates so many different things...the rhythm....the pauses.....
  

Meanwhile the house is silent...the family is sleeping....The dishwasher is done, Regan's oximeter went off because she needed a new tank of oxygen. I reset her tank so she is good for the night.....all is at peace....well at least he granted sleep to the ones I love.

Update on Tuesday

OH the face of this sweet baby....we had a big day yesterday. So I thought I should update everyone and this is my favorite photo of her so I had to put it in.

We saw her Nutritionist, Cybil, Regan has gained 1 lb and 3 oz in the past three weeks. That is really great...we are going to continue with the changes we have made to try to get her weight up. So that was good news. We want to continue on this track...Cybil does a great job figuring out all the details.

We also saw her pulmanologist Dr Johnson. She passed her over night test that they ran a few weeks ago that show that she does not have any significant sleep apnea. He thinks she is doing better than they expected. We will continue doing what we are doing. He is a very nice man.

We also saw Dr Karkos who is a special needs specialist. She went on and on about how much better Regan looked than the last time she saw her in April....that is good! She made several suggestions that will all be helpful for the everyday care of Regan. She is such a blessing.

This appointment took a long time but we are always glad to get a lot done at one visit.
Please continue to pray for her strength. She is awake more than she was....we have reduced her keppra to a lower dose and that seems to have helped. Her seizures are up and down but are more severe than they have been in a few minutes. This was going on before the reduction of the keppra so we don't think they are related.
School as started we are so glad...Ryder and Rylee are loving life...such a blessing. Ryder loves Junior High...it seems he like all the responsibility.
He has some new extra curricular activities that he is enjoying. This was their first day of school picture. (We have entered the don't make me smile in every picture phase.)
Rylee loves her teacher and is excited about seeing her friends. She loves Math and is considering playing Volley Ball this fall. We will keep you updated on that!
Brian is getting in the groove at work. Learning so much and reaching to be all God wants him to be. Thank you all for your prayers and support.
We feel strengthened for the journey.

Bloomin' Hope

For all of you who faithful read the blog you will remember that a rabbit ate my Black-eyed-Susan's.......still pains me to remember. I wanted to you see what started blooming there this week.
Those flowers are coming back....I thought they were a lose for this season but with time they have re-bloomed....THEY ARE RENEWED! So it has had my brain spinnin' about renewal of hope. To be renewed...."to make like new : restore to freshness, vigor, or perfection renew our strength in sleep" (this is according to Merriam Webster anyway)......oh how I long to be restored to freshness....to be made like new....it is on my mind because sometimes I need my hope renewed. I need my hope to be make like new in vigor. This some days my cynical heart gets the best of me, some days my tired flesh wins out, some days my mind just spins in unbelief. On those days days I need a renewal of hope! A few mornings ago God reminded me of Romans 15:13 "May the God of HOPE fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with HOPE by the power of the Holy Spirit."

He filled me with hope by blooming those flowers for me. He reminded me that I had given up on them but wasn't done...he had more in store to teach me with those silly little things. These verse reminds us that when we are filled with the God of HOPE then we overflow with hope.....I want to overflow with hope.....not with other things I sometimes overflow with. I know this is a matter of heart...some days I just don't let myself trust in Him...I make the decision I can handle life on my own. That I already know how life works, how people work, how I work. I sorta say inwardly ...."see that is the way it goes.." as if I know better than HE. Sometimes I just forget that hope is from God when we trust in Him.....God's action is the HOPE my action is the trust.

Regan brought me a flower home for Mother's day...it was just a little green steam sticking through dirt in a Styrofoam cup. Julie and I cried the day she brought it home because we weren't sure if Regan would be with us on Mother's Day. I put that little stick in the ground to see what it would do. Honestly I didn't think it would do much....but guess what...

It it the biggest and brightest plant in my yard.....I'd say it is overflowing with HOPE!
I pray today you will renew your trust today then I know He will fill you with renewed Hope...and I know you will overflow with Hope for all the world to see....and maybe even be surprised by!

8 Random Facts

I've been tagged by my friend Mandy to list 8 random/weird facts about myself on my blog...so here they are. (You can read Mandy's facts on her blog...I love the baby food one..that always makes me smile.)
1. I love reality TV (yes I know it is not real....)
2. I've been arrested twice.
3. I love to do laundry....I think this has to do with my childhood but doing laundry makes me feel responsible, motherly, and productive.
4.I worked in radio for almost three years while in high school. Getting paid to talk....a great job for me!
5. I was in in the "Miss Clinton" pageant when I was 18. it still cracks me up! I rocked in interview...but even then my thighs looked way to big in a swim suit!
6. I think fruit snacks smell like chap stick so sometimes I want to eat them because I ate chap stick as a child then other times they make me feel like I could throw up!
7. I love paradoxes.
8. I really love college students......really I do.....I DO!

I tag my mom, my mother in law Vera and my friend Parian....( you can just add it to to published comment since you don't have a blog....this will be fun....I wonder how long it will take?)

I am sorry for all of you who came to the blog today expecting something spiritual I hope you don't think less of me! I guess since it is all truth it is at least godly.

A Psalm from Ryder

Hi....this is Ryder. Last night I had a hard time falling asleep so I decided to write a psalm. So my mom thought you all would enjoy reading it. Here it is...

"In whom shall I put my Trust when Fear stalks me like a predator ready to strike and Anger lurks in the shadows, preparing to burst forth? In whom shall I put my Trust when Faith in things of the human world has failed and Happiness is but a memory? Whom shall call to me and rescue me from the Shadow Lands? Whom shall awaken me? The LORD."

"Whom shall cheer me when sorrow creeps in like fog and envelops me? Whom shall reassure me when uncertainty clouds my mind? The LORD."

"Whom shall pick me up when I have fallen? Who is my rock on which I stand? The LORD"